Saw this Merry Smutmas picture, just posted.
And there was my inspiration! This was written in about half-an-hour, and even got a very quick beta.
Title: What Didn't Happen
Pairing: "Snape/Lupin with a side order of Harry"
A/N: Written in honor of this Merry Smutmas gift picture. Much love to the artist; hope she likes it!
No, Harry thinks, no. I'm not doing this.
I'm not clutching myself while my two professors are kissing each other.
I'm not opening my trousers while my favorite professor is putting his hands on my most hated professor.
I'm not sliding my hand into my pants while Professor Lupin is pushing Professor Snape's robes open.
I'm not listening to them kiss, all those wet noises and little breathy sounds and the way Snape makes that uhn noise every time his mouth comes away from Lupin's. And that, oh God, that slick-on-slick sound, those are their tongues, moving against each other's, and which one is in the other's mouth now, I don't know, and that, that was their teeth hitting, fuck, that would hurt, and neither of them stopped, because I can still hear their tongues making that noise, and that's how hard they're kissing each other.
I'm not stealing looks at them from around this corner, I'm not, because that can't be Snape's thigh between Lupin's, it can't, can't be his bare thigh, no, God no, not his bare thigh that--that Lupin's pushing his--his groin against, he's not rubbing himself against Snape's knee, and fuck, that can't be him making that noise, oh God, he's grunting like that, that's really him, grunting every time Snape pushes that knee against him, and he's lifting into it, trying to push himself against it like--like he's trying to push Snape away from him with just his groin, and that just makes Snape lean in harder.
I'm not really gripping myself while Snape is grabbing fistfuls of Lupin's hair, and Lupin is pushing Snape's robes off his shoulders, no, that can't be Snape's bare chest, and oh fuck, that is not Lupin p-pinching his nipple like that, no it's not, o-oh fuck, he's not, fuck fuck fuck he's licking that nipple, fuck, Snape is hissing, Lupin's biting him, biting him there, oh fuck do it harder, yes harder, he likes it, oh fuck he's got his hand between Snape's legs, don't want to see have to see, fuck his robes are in the way fuck! let me see it oh god it's fucking purple, Lupin's hand is around it and I can just see it between Lupin's fingers and Lupin's gripping it like he's going to tear it off, fuck listen to them, Lupin just called him SeverusSeverusSeverus and fuck, Snape's got his whole weight on that knee, grinding into him, Lupin's under him, not letting go not letting go fuck harder harder don't stop don't stoahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
There are three climaxes in the room that night. Harry's is the nearest to silent.
Harry tries to deny to himself that that ever happened, as well.